Miss. Lizzza
Monday, December 21, 2009
I love Christmas lights. But I'm so not in the Christmas spirit for some reason. My house shows no sign of the holidays except the never ending snow outside and a snowman candle holder in my room. The only thing I'm excited about for the next three days is waiting for the day Sam calls me and tells me if he absolutely hates or adores the package I got him. LOL I wish I could have done better, but hey..I live in WI...there's not much around.
MY NIGHTMARE
Today I woke from two nightmares
One arise from too much YouTube late at night
The other was about a confrontation with my mother
She comes into my room mid-afternoon
She yells like a woman filled with rage and power
"Are you really serious about this guy you're seeing?"
And I reply Yes mom, I love him.
And she goes on to say how bad everything looks
I start to cry and I snapped back
You don't even know what love is mom
You married the wrong man and look at you now
So you can't even say anything about my relationship
I love him so much
And then she turns me around
And starts to pinch my hips
"You are so fat. You need to lose weight. Disgusting"
And I can't escape her.
And I wanted to disappear.
Then I woke up.
I never want to dream like this again.
But there's always hope and light when I wake
Because I still got you.
